Jealous Much?
by darkchakram
Summary: Xena and Gabrielle have a chance encounter with Ares and a barmaid.


Jealous Much?

by: darkchakram

PG

Summary: Xena and Gabrielle run into Ares at a tavern with a barmaid.

One shot

Written for the Shipper Fic challenge at XOC (Xena Online Community).

Disclaimer: Not mine, wish they were, especially Ares.

Spoilers: Nothing specific.

Timeline: Sometime during the third season.

"Land Ho," the sailor in the crow's nest called out.

Xena ran to the port side looking for land, and sure enough she could make out the mountainous silhouette of the Greek coast. She had never been happier to see dry land!

She had spent the last three days aboard this god's forsaken vessel, trying to drown out the moans and retching of Vomitus, a centaur who had never travelled by water before and was having difficulty finding his sea legs.

"Hold on Vomitus, we're almost there!" Xena rejoiced.

Vomitus trotted across the planks to see for himself. The clop clop of his hooves was followed by another round of hurling. As Xena watched chunks float on the majestic Aegean she wondered why the pressure point technique hadn't worked on the seasick centaur.

When the ship ported in Velika, a small seaside village, Gabrielle waited for her at the docks. She had attending a bard festival while Xena had travelled to the Ionian coast on an errand for King Lias. The friends embraced, then Gabrielle told Xena that she had booked them a room for the evening in the town's only inn. Xena was thankful that she would be able to get an evening's rest before embarking up the mountains tomorrow.

The tavern below the inn was dark and filled with the standard ruffians and sailors that Xena generally encountered in such places. As they hung up their bags on a peg, Xena politely declined a burly warrior's offer of an evening of sexual debauchery.

Finally, they found a seat and ordered some mead and stew.

Gabrielle chattered about the rhymes she had learned at the festival.

Xena half-listened to the tales about heroes and deities that so excited Gabrielle.

A leather-clad war god, cozied up to a tavern strumpet caught Xena's attention.

'Great,' she thought, 'never a moment's rest.' But as she looked at Ares, she couldn't shake the feeling that something felt off. It certainly wasn't beneath him to go slumming in a place like this, but his posture was all wrong. And then it hit her, she hadn't felt his presence. She wondered if was doing something to mask his presence from her, but as far as she could tell, he hadn't even noticed that she was here.

Xena nodded to where Ares and the woman were talking. Gabrielle glanced over her shoulder to see.

"Fantastic! What's he doing here?" Gabrielle gritted out sarcastically.

"Not sure, but something's up. I'll be right back," Xena moved to stand.

"We could just leave you know."

"Nah, something doesn't feel right, stay here," Xena ordered. Gabrielle rolled her eyes dramatically.

She watched as Xena sauntered up to Ares with a hand on her hip.

"Ares," she called.

He didn't turn at first, "Ares, don't pretend you didn't hear me!"

He turned to face her.

"Xena, Xena, the Warrior Princess," he answered.

"Ares, Ares, the god of war," she mirrored. "What are you doing here?"

"Minding my own business, I'd think you'd do the same."

"M-hm, who's your friend?" Xena gestured to the girl and for the first time noticed the heavy necklace the woman wore. She had seen similar pieces of jewelry but only on Olympus. The thing was worth thousands, It could get a girl in trouble in a dive like this.

"As I said, not of your concern, now, if you could please leave us."

Xena didn't like his formal tone, It wasn't like him. Plus, it miffed her that he was dismissing her in favor of this tawdry bar whore.

"I'll leave you to your fun," she answered him and then turned to the woman, "I wouldn't go flashing that piece around her too much if I were you."

Xena referencing the necklace set Ares off. He jumped from his seat. "Who do you think you are, bothering a god? What's the matter with you? Don't you show any respect?"

His outburst left Xena really confused. Ares knew damn well that she wasn't about to defer to him because he was a god. Was he showing off to impress his girlfriend? Well she'd fix that.

"You want to get out of my face, Ares," she warned.

He reared back to smack her. When he let his hand fly, Xena blocked it and with a wicked right jab sent him crashing into the table.

That was too easy, she thought. He must have lost some of his power, maybe all of it, that would explain why she couldn't "feel" him.

Ares scrambled up and began conjuring an energy ball with which to blast her.

Nope, definitely had his powers, but he usually favored fireballs, what was with these new orbs?

Just as Ares let loose one of the energy balls, Xena felt the familiar tingle that the god of war sent through her. Suddenly, Xena was seeing double as Ares intercepted Ares' energy ball.

She shook her head.

Outed, the first Ares transformed into a sickly and shriveled looking man.

"Proteus," Xena gasped. Things started to make sense.

The woman shrieked and bolted from the table, Proteus ripped the necklace from her fleeing form and disappeared from the scene himself.

Xena turned to the real Ares, "Why's he impersonating you, now?"

"Guess Herc already busted him and besides tavern girls like me better than Herc, anyway. You, of all women, should know that," he winked.

"What's with the necklace?"

"He had Hephy craft it, it keeps the wearer from seeing his true reflection in mirrors or water.."

"I see."

"Know what I saw?"

"What's that?" she asked.

"Jealousy!"

"You wish!"

"You can't lie to me, Xena. You were pissed that I might prefer some easy lay to you."

"I don't care who or what you lay!"

"You'll always be my first choice, my sweet. Always!" He blew her a kiss and disappeared in shards of light.

Xena released a breath she didn't know she'd been holding.

Damn, she hated it when he was right!


End file.
